my lifes going to the dogs :(

omg worset day of my life i woke up this morning late i didnt feeling good cuz im supost to start and i am bloted but thats not even the bad part i said something about being bloted and my mom told me i should go on a watter diet cuz im fat well she didnt say i was fat but hey she ment it she trys to convince me she has lost 200 pounds by drinking watter witch is a lie she didnt start loseing her weight intill she got on add meds then i got in the car this morning and she told me i looked like shit to go brush my hair so that sucked and i got to school and it all went down hill from there and 7th class came around i finaly got happy and laughting and i had to come home i got yelled at cuz my mom thinks im an imbarrasment and a worthless child ..... sometimes i wish i could just disappear cuz honestly i think my family spends there days trying to find things to hate about me i hope they dont come to my premotion seramony pule i have an f whitch ill get yelled at for and everything eles we went to wall mart and my brother was acting up and  i get yelled at cuz everything that goes wroung is always my freaking falt .......and then we went to go eat and mom picked a place i hate so i wasent going to eat plues im kinda doing that diet thing and she yelled and me and told me i better freaking eat or eles welll ughh sorry just a long day g2g dad wants to yell some more bye

your sad emo girl :'(

love

i love him i think well it feels like love but im not sure hes amazeing  when im with him i feel whole but then when we are away from eatch other i feel like ive  had a whole put in my heart and then i like him and i no i shouldnt be i do hes sweet charming and sencitive anyway my bf doesnt no me and i want him to im trying to talk to him and tell him things but he want tell me things about him its like hes keeping me out but i guess if he dont want me in i shouldnt push my luck but i guess thats y i find my self staying up late talking to the other for hes going throw the same things i am she wont let him touch her not even a hug i see his pain and i hate seeing him sad for he has made me feel so much better idk what to do then my other friend is finding him self with me in his heart yet hes in my soul i feel him there its like hes always been there ik him yet ive just meat him idk its crazy but then again my life is crazy isent it. but anyway enoffe about my drama tonight is about the true reason i came to blogg im stressed cuz i start collage in jan so i have to take the act the 23rd my grades cant drop below a b and idk what to do. sometimes i wonder y im so smart is it a curse or a blessing idk yet idk if ill ever no but intill i find out

your loveing emo girl <3

vacaton

hey its me again im on vactaion this time ya ik what ur thinkin y do u have ur computer on vacation but it was eather that or go insane u no.....this vacation is ok if it wasen tfor my cuzions tho id be deppressed worse then i am they have hung out wiff me when my dad and bro go hang out and my mom lays out wiff out them idk what i would do cuz id be all by my self my parents say we are leaveing tommorow idk y tho they are just jerks and dont get it we only got here yesterday ik i probly sound like im always complaining but i got to let it out somewhere or id go insane my ex who i might be still in love wiff not sure yet....i dont wannna b i dont think im kinda mad at him cuz he has a gf but he got all pissed off last night when me and an old ex of mine where jokeing around we wearnt even really flirting we dont like eatch other like that no more....my best guy friend i have a thing for and when he get high he tells me he likes me to and all this but when he comes back around he denis it so who no if its true or not then this other guy im takeing to i have liked for a while but i just now got the guts to tell him he likes me to but i dont think we will date one because he doesnt like haveing a gf and i  get that i mean if u no u cant be faithful y even try u no all u will do is hurt u or someone u care bout then my new friend is reayy cute he kinda look  like my bestfriend but he has a gf i think he has a thing for me tho cuz he was like geting me horny and stuff just cuz he knew he could and then there my best girl friends or my (wife for the summer lol inside joke) ex bf i kinda like hi mand he asked me to go streking wiff him i wont manly cuz my parents wont let me do anything it sucks bad but how can i stop it ya no but anyway what does it matter im kinda sleepy and prob bout to have a fight wiff my ex again so i guess ill write later

your depressed,confused,sleepy,horny,upset,loveing emogirl

pics i like

these are just some pics i really like :) love ur adorable emo girl :)

my paarents suck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

u might be wondering y this is titled what it is bu it because im 99.99% sure my parents hate me why eles would they try so dang hard to ruin my life??? they refuse to let me go to my bfs house cuz im not 16...but when it was the  guy they had picked for me i went over there everyday almost.......but on top of that my mom thinks she nos every thing bout me and shes trying to tell me wat my feeling are about  when she wont even let me tell her them.....cuz being in a failing marriage for 16 years makes her the best dang person ever in love advice i mean it issent like she is perfect cuz i don't think sleeping with 3 different guys in bout 3 months is perfect explicitly when ur divorce has when throw!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and now shes acting all freakin godly ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh i cant stand her!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  me and my dad barely talk so it issent like im geting anyhelp there :( i cant wait till im 18. oh not to Menuhin i woke up this morning to find something very important to me broken in half. the favortiseum between me and my bother is sooooooooooooo a pain in the butt the jerk gets almost anything he wants and says whatever he wants on top of that i cant stand any of this

 your sad hopeless emogirl :(

never been more confused EVER!!!!!!!!!!

My lifeis hard as u can tell but now its confuseing cuz i have a new bf and hes awesome inless we are fighting witch we do alot cuz i have alot of guy friensds he doesnt like at all!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! but its ok one of my guy firends is really cute and i kinda wanna be wiff him but at the same time i love my bf and wanna stay wiff him even tho we have only been together 3 weeks and 2days :) im writeing this in my tect classs and its wierd cuz a guy i like is siting bhind me im just thankful the print is to small to be seen and his bestfriend is beside me but thats enoofe bout them:) i was unsure if i wanted to stay wiff my bf cuz theres a good chance my parents wont let me hang out cuz my mom found out we got in a fight and he yelled at me so now she says hes got alot of proveing to do.....i really wanna c him tho cuz summer is comeing in like 2 days and its going to suck if we dont get to hang out  if we dont ill have to hang out wiff some of my other guy friends one of the guys i like none of my friends like and they call him a man hoe but idc cuz hes not what they think hes really sweet but ..idk my friends bf told me he was in love wiff me the other day and idk wat to do bout that eather oh well idc cuz im not going to worrie bout it once school ends cuz i plain on geting a nice tan and spending most my time by my pool :) i think im going to stay wiff my bf :) even if we dont get along sometimes hes still awesome when he wants to be well ill blog again later the guy beside me is trying to read this lol :)

i HATE MY LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

you no how i had that perfect life yesterday welll..........................lets just say i should have known better nothing is perfect ovouly .....my bestfriend might be right my bf may just want in my pants...got to love that huh...oh well he told me tonight that he doesnt want to fall in love with me ....his excuse is geting hurt yea ive used it myself thats how ik it an excuse u use when ur scared of geting into a true relationship...but get this he still wants perps likes makeing out and crap ughhhh talk about p.oed u have no idea i wanted to cry my eyes out now i just want to put him throught hell ya no. I have a bunch of friends but wheni need them there to busey (f-in,deasling with there probems that i lission to day in and day out or my favorit with there bfs...) dont u just love my bestfriends oh then my "brother" wont even answer his phone.... im going to ask tommorrow y he didnt. the only one that answers is my ex and his answer is my bf only wants in my pants cuz hes done and said the same thing ..... yes welcome to my lil peace of peridice im going to pray..... maybe ill get something there like who nos maybe god will let him call me when hes high and ill get all my answers hey it could happen he is suppost to get high tommorow...anyway...i think im going to idk cry,pary,die in a hole,text, or whire who nos im starteing to hope my bf doesnt call back tonight :( this is yellow cuz its my bfs fav color yuk!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Your depressed emogirl :'(

i dont really no :)

i havent posted in a long time manly cuz ive been bussy cuz everythings been going right 4 the 1st time ever!!!!!! my parents like my new bf hes a s8r boy and a hot one at that lol my bestfriend is still gay but he has a thing for me lol i love him to death and he has a thing 4 me but hes GAY if he wasent gay i might would but he is so i cant /wont ....my bi friend told me she wants me oh i have 2 new bi friends lol yea im strate tho lol i love my man so much we desided to slow down tho but idc i love him ill be 15 soon so cant wait lol my parents are excepting me again but the ppl at church well thats a different story most of them love me except this one family but idc what they think cuz they dont matter everyone nos what there rep is anyway so no sence in careing what they say if ya get me....im going to be in another play this time i have a speeking part im at a sleep over lol btw friday i might be haveing one of those with 2 of my best chick friends it will be wierd tho cuz  well nvm  i cant wait till friday night tho we are haveing a bondfire and i get to hang wiff my amazeing one of a kinda bf and sister lol i supost to being doing a project but im not idc anymore its the end of the year and im sick of this stupied crap. i got new pjs cuz the ones i have are to inaprpeate for the play at church i hate not being able to wear shorts to church but oh well im hanging with some new ppl kinda got tired of the others cuz they where being babyish and not geting the fact that im me and not going to change...im writeing again while i wasent posting i had writer block but that doesnt matter cuz im back lol and better then ever :) manly cuz im with this amazeing guy who makes me poor out my heart on to a piece of paper who will never juge me or tell me im being used just cuz they may or may not want in my pants!!!!!!! sorry i have a sertain friend..... nvm back to where i was oh yea my baby lol he hates that word idc tho its hot expecly when i say it lol jk im not that conseaded and if i am plzz feel free to tell me to get off my self cuz well u have that right.im still emo but its harder to show it when a sertian friend borrows yo leggings and doesnt give them back lol love ya girl she also has my shirt and skirt. the sadest thing i have done this week is found out 2 of my friends are most likely preganit and its only monday pplz this is insane!!! one of my friends could die if she is cuz her body cant take it and the other is really younge and stupied and I hope shes not cuz the guy it would be by would run off and not help her out and then we would have to just beat him up. but enoffe about that sad stuff my dad planted a garden hes trying to bring our family closer i have a feeling hes just wasteing money but i like that stuff hes planted in it so im not complaning lol we have been spending alot of money lately to much really but it will be ok dad says i have to get off here soooo goodnight world!!!!!

The Spontanous,crazy,loveing,silly,amazeing emo girl <3